These are not people I think are terrible or monumentally untalented. That would be a very long list indeed (Hi, Adam Sandler!). No, these are hugely popular entertainers that just leave me scratching my head as to just WHY they are considered wonderful. I've tried them and was just plain underwhelmed. It may be them, it may be me, it may be the power of effective marketing for everyone else. I just don't know.
1. Garth Brooks
Biggest selling solo artist of all time (and probably will be forever, with the way the album is declining). I am utterly mystified as to why. He has a few catchy melodies here and there but not one song that makes me even want to download it by itself, much less buy a zillion of his albums. Chris Gaines had a decent song but that's as close as it gets for me. Garth lovers will make me sit down as they say, "You obviously haven't heard THIS song!" and invariably they play "The Thunder Rolls." Zzzzzzzzzzz. The lyrics are somewhat above average but it has not a single innovative note. Even if it were phenomenal, would that justify the rest of his success? I also don't like his obsession with being the biggest selling solo artist of all time. He has been see-sawing with Elvis Presley at the top for a few years. Whenever The King passes him, he releases a newly reshuffled greatest hits CD to edge back ahead. Hopefully, Elvis' label will return the favor! Also, deep down he's a rock 'n' roller and he seems to be parodying country on half his songs. On hits like "Three of Kind, Workin' on a Full House" and "Friends In Low Places," he affects such an over-the-top twang that I can't believe anyone would think he's playing it straight. I'm not a country hater. I own dozens of country albums. I just don't get Garth's awesomeness.
2. Johnny Depp
He's a great actor. But he isn't the greatest, not even of his generation. And Jack Sparrow? Any of a hundred actors could have done a drunken, sexually ambiguous swagger for seven hours. How that performance - out of all his excellent work - gets singled out as brilliant is beyond my comprehension (and Depp's, too, I'd imagine). It's mildly amusing but it's not hilarious by any stretch. My wife would also like to add that she is absolutely lost as to why women find him irresistible. She thinks he looks "greasy" and needs a serious scrubbing with disinfectant.
To Be Continued...
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6 comments:
I agree about Garth 100%.
Don't know anything about Depp...
You mean you haven't been forced by the boys to watch 'Pirates of the Caribbean' 30 times?
Johnny Depp is one of my favorite actors. He's played a wide variety of characters in diff genres and more often than not hits a homerun. granted any one could have played the pirate part but he still hit it out of the park. the movies are just overrated.
Garth Brooks just sound like a country singer to me. course i don't listen to country so i wouldn't know what qualifies as country talent . . .
I'm beginning to think I should change that entry to "Jack Sparrow" rather than Johnny Depp. And you're right about the POTC movies. I fell asleep during the 2nd and 3rd ones!
I fell asleep too...
You, sir, are wildly out of line. Johnny Depp is my role model.
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